Wednesday, August 17, 2005

I'm a Survivor

I survived the iBook Riot of Richmond!! If you don't know what I am talking about, here is the link...

Times Dispatch article

Our county was selling off iBooks because they are switching to Dell for the school kids. Anyway, they had 1,000 to sell for $50. Alan and I thought we might as well try and get one since it was such a good deal. Would have been cool for Sage and I to use around the house. So we arrived at 5:30 and got in a long line. Turns out there was no need for a line because the idiots running the sale just opened the gate up at 7 and let people run in like crazy freaks. It was ridiculous. People were trampled, thank goodness there were only minor injuries. Alan and I were not at the front and not involved in the trampling. Although I told my mom (just for fun) that I was the one who ran over the old man with the walker. :)

Anyway, Alan and I didn't get one. Mainly because we are not aggressive people and are not willing to trample, push, or cut in front of people. We are too civilized, I guess. I was disappointed but I figure that those people must have needed it a lot more than I did. What really made us angry was the way the whole thing was handled. I think they should have let people in gradually instead of in a huge stampede. They could have also passed out numbers or tickets guaranteeing you a computer instead of letting 10,000 people stand out in the hot sun wondering if they would get one. Alan and I stayed a good while hoping that we might have a shot. Also because rumors were running rampant that they had more than 1,000 iBooks. Why else would they let all those people just stay there waiting? We found out later it was because they were idiots. It was really unnecessary for people to get hurt over this. I talked with two high school students who had been trampled. The girl had scrapes on her elbow, knees, shoulder and hip. The guy had a footprint mark on the back of his shirt and told me "I thought I was going to die." That really upset me. They only had 5 off duty cops there at the beginning of the sale and by the end had 70 cops there, some in riot gear. Alan said that was like closing the barn door after the horse had already run out.

The guy who was in charge of running the sale made some very ignorant comments in the news after the sale such as "people came out for the excitement or entertainment value." And they (the county) would not have done anything any differently. That really pissed me off and I wrote him a scathing email. I also wrote the Board of Supervisors to complain about him. I am such a rebel. ;)

Well, though we came away empty handed (except for a sunburn) it wasn't all bad. Just mostly. I did meet some nice people and had a few laughs. They liked it when I played Bob Marley's "Get up, Stand up" for them from my iPod. Alan and I had some alone time--we bonded. And I can always tell my grandchildren how I was there at the iBook Riot of 2005. :) I had a great idea for a t-shirt "I stood in line for an iBook and all I got was this lousy t-shirt." Someone beat me to the punch though. Check it out
Very funny.

Monday, August 15, 2005

Pussy Problem

Or is it a kitty conumdrum? My cat is sooooo fat. How fat is she? She is sooooo fat that she cannot clean her own ass. As you can imagine, there is a crappy, smelly buildup. And just to add an exclamation point to the fact that she has a nasty ass, our little darling has recently started the practice of dragging her large bottom around and leaving track marks on the carpet. It's her own little breadcrumb trail, but with shit. So we tried to handle it like this...

But the size 4 diaper didn't really fit and did not stay on long. As you can tell she is not amused.

So now we have to take her to the vet every six weeks for her booty shave. We also have to wash the area on a regular basis. And Daddy Alan gets the pleasure of being the resident cat ass washer. I am on the side of the tub yelling, "Clean that kitty! Polish that Pussy!" As you can tell he is not amused.


Saturday, August 06, 2005

11? Feels like 107

Today Alan and I are celebrating our 11th anniversary. We always joke that it feels like so much longer. And for me it does, but not in a bad way. I feel like my life began when I met him. It is just hard for me to think about the years that I did not know him--well, except for the college years which were kick ass--woooooo!! Anyway, we met in second semester of our 4th year at UVA which was perfect timing. We had both sown our wild oats apart and now were ready to sow some together. Boy, that sounded so 'Corn'y! Ha, I crack myself up. We started dating on March 27th, 1992 and he asked me to marry him on December 23rd, 1993. That was a formality really because from very early on I knew I would marry him. Alan claims that he knew he would marry me after our first meeting. On the one hand that is so cool, but on the other hand it's a little creepy. Is he my soulmate or my stalker?

So you may ask, after 11 years are you still in love with him? Yes, yes and again yes. Of course it is a very different love than it was 11 years ago--then it was all "this is so romantic being able to finally live with you and have sex and be all cutesy." Now I would describe it as a "you are my partner in all things and the father of my children and if you ever left me alone with them I would take a Henkel and cut out your still beating heart" kind of love. Yes, love means
never having to tell your mate that you don't want any more children because he feels the same way.

On that note, for his anniversary present, Alan will receive a pack of Trojans and a gift certificate for a few sessions of couple's therapy. Alright, I am just kidding about the therepy, but the Trojans, mabye not so much. My kids are the best gift Alan has ever given me, but if I want to stay married another 11 years or more, we have to stop at 2. And ever since Shepard has grown out of the infant stage we have been able to get out on our own a little more and recapture some of the passionate 1994 love. Yes, I have a thong and I am prepared to use it!! Now I am exciting myself. Gotta go and shave the pits for my romantic night. Holla!