Saturday, February 23, 2008

The F-Word

Sage says, "Mommy, I am going to say the F word." I said, "Ok, go ahead" and he says, "FART!!" Then he laughs and does a little dance. I, for one, have never like the word 'fart.' It just sounds nasty. So I have always insisted that the boys say 'pass gas' or 'poot' instead of 'fart.' But I have to admit that there are some words that, though they sound bad or make me feel uncomfortable, are just the most appropriate word for the situation. Fart is one of those words. And though I may not like hearing it, there really is no other word that does the act justice.

Another word that fits the bill is 'retarded.' This word is a hot button one at the moment. In fact, the GA in my state is trying to pass a bill that will abolish the future and past use of this word in their documents. I can see the point of discontinuing the use of the word going forward. But to go back and change every document of the past seems a bit like PC run wild, not to mention expensive--it will cost the tax payers about $70,000. As a nurse I have cared for many (and loved some) mentally challenged patients. I don't want to offend them or their families but come on, when dealing with the mentally challenged or men, it captures the essence of the situation so much better than the alternatives.

As far as expressive words go, sometimes there is no better feeling than to let the real F-word fly. Since becoming a mom, I have had to quell my use of this word or use substitutions. Saying 'Flibber-di-jibit', 'Flipper-flu', 'Frick' or just plain 'Oh, F!' may be better around the kid but is not as satisfying as a good, loud "F-U-C-K!" It's such a versatile word too. Not only is it an expletive, but it can be a noun, verb, and adjective as well. So many uses--Fuck you, Fuck me, Fuck that, Fucking-A!, I don't give a flying fuck!, Fuck you and the horse you rode in on!, Fucking fantastic! (or Fucktastic), That's fucked up, Fuck no!, Fuck, yes!, and the infamous OH, FUCK! Just to name a few. As you can see, sometimes there is just no better word to express yourself.

So, can I really deny my boys the use of the word 'fart' when it is just the best option? Well, I can for now, but not forever. One day they won't stand for substitutes. I will just have to get used to Sage's F-word. And let's not forget the S-word.....STUPID!!


Anonymous said...

Words are what they are and I'm not for changing things just because someone's feelings get hurt. I definitely think the "N" word is 100% of the time used to hurt so it shouldn't be used ever by any race. Some people just need to get over it.

My favorite curse word is the "S" word. When I'm really mad I let the F-bombs fly.

My FIL uses "fudge" a lot.


S E E Quine said...

` I like the Monty Python sketch of that name. The total dryness is just perfect!
` I myself had to say the word 'click'. Yes, that's right. 'Click'. Like.... WTF?
` Well, my psycho dad was a control freak - every time I'd watch Salute Your Shorts (which had the theme song "Camp Anawana, we hold you in our hearts, and when I think about you, it makes me wanna fart! ...It's 'I hope we never part! Now get it right or pay the price!'") well, he'd just slam the TV off and scream; "You watch all this shit with its fuckin' swearing, you're eventually going to wind up some cussin' little bitch no one can stand!"
` Seriously. Double WTF!