Tuesday, September 15, 2009

2009's putting J.Hi in a corner

Noooooo, not Swayze too!!

What the hell is going on here?! Why is the year 2009 trying to kill my childhood?

I swear if Simon Le Bon dies next, I am going to freaking LOSE IT, People!!!!

Up yours 2009!!

And don't even think about messing with Michael J. Fox!!!!!

Free at last, free at last

The kids started school last week and boy have I been lazy!!! I was sad to see my baby Shepard start kindergarten...well, I was sad for like thirty seconds after he got on the bus and then I was elated. It's the sweet smell of freedom, baby! Weeeeehoooooo!!
Shepard has adjusted well to school and says that he loves it. On Friday, he was able to pick a prize from the treasure box in his classroom for being well behaved all week. When he got off the bus he showed me his prize and said, "Look what I got on the last day!" Later we were discussing how he does not go to school on Saturday or Sunday but would return Monday. He seemed surprised and said, "Who will I have when I go back?" Ha! I guess he thought four days and he was done with kindergarten.
Sage is in 4th grade this year. On Friday, his school showed the older students the Obama speech. I asked Sage about the speech and he said, "I think it was about education or something."
I knew Shepard would do well with adjusting to school. But I did have one big concern. He is still not wiping his own butt. He can do it, he just chooses not to. He usually calls Alan or me to come in to help him. Halfway through the summer we decided to get tough with him and refuse to come when he called. But the child would just sit there. I swear I think he would have sat on the toilet all day waiting for us to do his dirty work. I couldn't stand it and would usually go in and help him. However, with school coming, I knew I had to dole out some tough love.
This was a typical exchange...
"Moooooommmy!!! Come here!, I'm in the bathroom!!!
No Shepard, you have to try and wipe yourself!
No! I'm not coming.
Mommy, I'm not pooping. I'm stuck! I'm stuck in the bathroom, Mommy. Come here!
Shepard, you have to try wiping first and then I will come and check you!
But it hurts my arm to wipe!
Shepard, everyone on the whole planet wipes. I know you can do it too.
Mommy, come here!!!
Come on, Mommy. I'll buy you new pillows!!!!"
Ok, how am I supposed to resist that? It's mental torture. Alan was more impervious to his pleas and when he was there I had to rely on his strength. One day Shepard called, "Daaaaaady, come here!" When Alan refused, he continued, "Moooooomy!!!" I refused. Then there was a pause. "Saaaaaaage!!!" Sage said, "Oh No!! I don't think so."
I finally had a serious talk to Shepard explained to him that when he went to kindergarten his teacher would not wipe his butt. I asked him what he was going to do if he pooped at school. He said, "I am only going to do number one at school." Well, at least he has a plan. Hope that works for him. I did tell Sage that I was going to have to list him as Shepard's 'Poop contact' so he could help Shepard wipe at school. Sage said, "Well, I hope it's during Math class."